COME OUT AND PLAY

by Wendy Yang Clark

Instagram… hope to so many pearls of wisdom, some true, others not

My mom sent me an Instagram Reel a few days ago that read “children get their peak oxytocin from playing with their dad, and their peak oxytocin from cuddling with their mom…” I’m not sure how real this is (though a quick and dirty Google search says YES), but I do know that in my family, it holds pretty true. Dad is fun, and I’m snuggler-in-chief. Playing with my kids, I try my best to immerse myself in their games, but it’s tough to get in the flow of make-believe when there’s a very real to-do list running through my head. As an adult, it can be tough to fully commit to playing pretend. Meanwhile, kids dive headfirst into play without a second thought. Why is it so easy for them and so hard for us?

We get bogged down by responsibilities and are so used to being productive that we forget how to let go and have fun. We worry about looking dumb or wasting time, where kids (at least little ones) are naturally in the moment, their imaginations running wild without any concern for what others might think. My daughter will do gladly a headstand at any (every) moment - she’s not yet worried about the embarrassment of flashing her Moana underwear. Kids embrace play with a freedom we’ve long forgotten.

Women can have a particularly hard time committing to play. Traditional gender roles have long placed the burden of caregiving and household responsibilities disproportionately on women, leaving us with less time & energy for play. We’re expected to be nurturers and caretakers, which makes it difficult to justify taking time out for ourselves to have fun. Pressures on us to maintain a certain image or some kind of ladylike decorum can make us self-conscious about letting loose.  

Boy are often encouraged to express themselves through physical activities and sports, which are forms of play. Roughhousing, competitive sports, and outdoor adventures are often more associated with boys and men, fostering a lifelong habit of incorporating play into their routines.

It’s crucial that we challenge these norms and carve out time for play in our lives. Because play isn't just for kids, it’s incredibly important for adults too.

Research shows that engaging in playful activities as adults can significantly boost our well-being. Play enhances neuroplasticity, which is the brain's ability to adapt and change - it helps keep our brains sharp and flexible. Engaging in novel activities stretches your brain, boosting cognitive function and memory.

Summertime is the perfect season to embrace play. Remember those carefree days of childhood, spent at the beach, building sandcastles and jumping into the waves? Running through sprinklers and cannonballing butt-first into the deep end? Catching fireflies and scratching mosquito bites till they bled? Just because we’re older now doesn’t mean we can’t recapture some of that magic.

At The Pearl, it’s our mission to find joy in movement. Belly dance is one of those playful modalities where you can truly let loose. The rhythm, the choreography, and the super fast pace make it exhilarating. You have no choice but to let go of any stress about looking silly, because your brain is absolutely consumed with trying to memorize the moves, keep your hips shaking to the beat, and keep your shoulders shimmying at all times. I've seen so many of our members come alive in these classes (myself included!), laughing, shaking off the day's stress, and letting go of inhibitions.  

Dance like no one is watching…

Ballet is another great way to incorporate play into your life. Putting on my ballet slippers (for the first time in about 30 years) makes me feel like a little girl again, pretending to be a light-on-my-feet fairy princess. Our adult ballet class doesn’t take itself too seriously - it’s for anyone looking to add a little grace and a lot of fun to their day. Ballet can enhance your coordination, balance, and strength while making you feel elegant and joyful. Dance with the joy and freedom of Elaine Benis - like no one is watching.

We also have a new super fun Pilates class: Reformer - Jump! This class combines the benefits of Pilates with the fun of jumping, offering a playful and heart-pumping workout. It’s like being on a trampoline - you’ll get some serious airtime! Jump! will make you sweat/laugh giddily/pant/groan. It's a great way to release mood-boosting endorphins.

Let's not overlook another form of play for adults: sex. Engaging in sexual play is crucial for maintaining a healthy, intimate relationship (with your partner, or with yourself!). It promotes physical health and overall happiness. Sexual activity releases endorphins and oxytocin, which help reduce stress and anxiety, improve sleep, and boost mood. It’s also a form of exercise, burning calories and improving cardiovascular health. ✅

We have a titillating workshop planned for August - Sensual Fluidity Dance, which teaches participants to explore their sensuality through movement. This workshop is designed to help you connect with your inner goddess, boost your confidence, and have fun in a supportive, playful environment.

Spending time with friends and the studio community is also a form of play. Having strong interpersonal connections is the most important factor for longevity and happiness. Whether it's through group classes, social gatherings, or just having a laugh with a friend, these relationships enrich our lives and make play even more enjoyable.

It’s so easy to get stuck in our routines and forget to make time for fun. But play is incredibly important for our mental and physical health. It helps us relax, reduces stress, and improves our overall well-being. Next time you’re here, don’t just think of it as a workout - think of it as a chance to play. To reconnect with that kid who loved to move and laugh without a care in the world. Grab a buddy and let’s dance, laugh, jump, shimmy, and plié our way to better health together.